We Woke!

Paul woke in the Thai hostel at 6.30 am, or rather was woken at that unearthly hour by the motorway above which he and Andrew had been ‘sleeping’ for the last few days. He went to the floor below to make a coffee for Andrew, a rare occurrence as he was never normally up before his partner. Well not in the morning! As he rooted through flaxseed, linseed and milk produced from organic rice picked by a chanting virgin, he attempted to blot out the conversation coming from a small […]

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A Long-Brawl Trip!k

After a mammoth long-brawl journey involving three flights, two taxis, a rickety shuttle bus and a near emergency landing due to some old git having a panic attack at 37,000 feet, The Lola Boys arrived in Chiang Mai in northern Thailand. Neither of them felt or looked their best. In fact Paul literally had no eyes! This happened to be an irony, as had he used his irises, when he still possessed them, he may not have booked he and Andrew into the ‘VIP’ room at the ‘Iris Hostel.’ The […]

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Recognition At Last !

Paul stood in a West London branch of Tesco’s attempting to deflect the ardent admiration of a bespectacled oddball who was quite convinced that he was a member of a famous rock band. ‘It is you isn’t it?’ he said, in a clipped South African accent, whilst reaching into his pocket for the ubiquitous mobile camera phone. ‘I know who you are!’, he continued. ‘Really’, replied Paul, rather kindly, as he stretched for a Canteloupe. ‘Yes. You’re with that band. Not ‘The Stones’. The other one. Wow! Yeah! Do you […]

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Crossing The ‘Chanel’ or Up Yours!

Paul’s week had begun and ended in a rather similar fashion – most bizarrely. The first incident had occurred at a swanky party in Sotogrande, at which ‘The Lola Boys’ had been performing. It had been a roaring success apparently. The boys had been joined by ‘Burly Chassis,’ ‘Tina Turnoff,’ and ‘Amy Crackhouse’! It had been the first time Paul had clambered into a mini skirt and an overstuffed bra for quite a while. Secretly he found the whole dressing up thing a bit of a drag. He was getting […]

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Gay Pride!

Paul sat. He stared closely at the motorway which paraded as a promenade in a small, nearly charming town north of Malaga! He and Andrew had performed the previous night – in more ways than one ! The manager of the ‘Hotel Estacion’ (which was nowhere near a fucking station!) was most disturbed. Paul knew he could add to the squat proprietor’s malaise by telling him that the food he had served up at his tawdry establishment was what one might call – ‘mierda’! Pero – no! It was the […]

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Day 10. Aruba.

Now as they were closer to the equator, Paul and his motley crew were feeling terribly tropical. They’d fallen in love with their vessel and were always happy to get back aboard after a trip ashore. Paul’s mother had described her as ‘home’. At the close of play in the Margarita-infused capital of Oranjestad however, she nearly didn’t make it home! Shortly after docking in Aruba Linda, Tina, Bill and Grace took the local bus to the beach, whilst Uncles Paul and Andy opted for a sedate walk about town. […]

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Day 9. Bonaire.

The flat little island of Bonaire proved to be a delightful surprise. The touting and conning ubiquitous to most of the ports so far was obviously in evidence. The family was quoted the price of a small car to take a tour of the tiny island and less than politely refused. They were alive to the rip off merchants and tore into them for their unjustified behaviour – Andrew especially. Telling one taxi driver he could buy his car a new engine for the price he’d quoted to take them […]

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