Two Pricks In Brighton!

Paul was still waiting to be pricked for a second time, not a situation he found himself in that often, but he knew until the pop up vaccination unit came again he was not safe. Not entirely. The damned ‘Delta’ variant had truly burst it’s banks and in Brighton there was a veritable flood of infections incurring. He did not want to be paranoid, yet he also wanted to start working again as soon as possible. It had been a year and a half now since the damned virus had […]

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Ferry Cross The Biscay

The infamous Bay Of Biscay, which was so often a turbulent grey soup, turned out to be a placid  aquamarine mill pond. As blue as the Carribean sea and with an air temperature to match.  On deck of the Brittany ferry Galicia, Paul  looked towards the picturesque and ever diminishing port of Santander and wiped away a maudlin tear.  He blamed it on the cheap lager, but he knew deep down that he was just very bad at Adios. Goodbyes to him had never come easy. It was an over […]

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The Second Coming!

Paul sat in the verdant garden of an old Cantabrian house which had obviously been transformed into a knocking shop for middle ranking coppers and dodgy MPs. As he watched Andrew smoke a cigarette he took a long, deep breath.   In.  Pause.  And then out.  Just as he’d read how to do in the countless self-help books he’d read and re-read over countless unhelpful years.  It made absolutely no difference. He was still pissed off after being snubbed by a couple in white linen, quite obviously unmarried, who had both sneered at his apparel whilst conducting an insidious affair over a bowl of green olives. They’d not even given him a nod as he bade them Buenos Tardes, both far too busy betraying their kids and their partners and whispering their sweet somethings.  Nothing! Not even a slight smile. Paul didn’t care.  Much!  After all, he had  just driven nearly halfway across Spain, lost he and Andrew’s passports,(allegedly!), driven back the other way, sorted the emergency travel documents which were now needed and then raced back across The Iberian Peninsula.  Carmen and Carlos conducting their sordid little liaison behind a Mimosa, minus manners, were certainly not going to prove the proverbial last straw that broke his donkey’s back. Paul was far too determined to get back to Blighty without any more hitches – so any rudeness from some unhitched blighters was easy to ignore. Besides, he and Andrew’s journey […]

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Spexit Stage Right.

It was a year to the day since The Lola Boys had last performed. In showbiz terms that is. Paul and Andrew had not sung in public since they had been marooned in their macaroon-pink house in the Philippines. On that occasion they had managed to pick up a dodgy internet connection and let rip online with an ad hoc mix of rum and Lola. Costumes they had thrown together, then thrown on, had to suffice, and Andrew’s mini watercolour set supplied the makeup! A disastrous decision given the crematorium […]

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The Show Must Go On !

The Lola Boys had quite often played to a spaced out crowd. But by any measure, that was usually down to the Spanish kind, measures that is, not for lack of an audience. Now with social distancing looking to be the norm into the near distance, anybody sitting too near a distance was a no no! Also any performers treading the boards had to do so at least two metres apart. What a bloody performance! Paul was worried it could be the end of theatre as they knew it. He […]

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I Have Always Depended On The Kindness Of Strangers!

‘I have always depended on the kindness of strangers’ is the heroine’s famous final line of the Tennessee Williams classic , ‘A Streetcar Named Desire.’ Blanche Dubois speaks it to the doctor who gently takes her arm to cart her off to the loony bin in the play’s tragic denouement. Her freedom taken from her – Blanche is forced into lockdown. Much like Paul and Andrew and the rest of the world had been recently.  Like poor Blanche control had been snatched from them, unlike Blanche they hadn’t yet gone […]

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Brighton Doesn’t Rock!

Paul gazed along the deserted promenade on Brighton seafront. There were a few sun worshippers pebbled along the beach praying metres apart to their god of choice, who repaid his loyal congregation’s faith with a show of pure brilliance. The sky was a cornflower blue and the light breeze barely perceptible. Paul had rarely visited England’s south coast under such perfect weather conditions. In normal times the place would have been crowded with day trippers and those just tripping. Awash with paddle boarders or those simply paddling. Beach lovers decked […]

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Keeping Up Our Holy Spirits!

Time had seemed to slow to that of the pace of an ancient sea turtle on the tropical island. Paul and Andrew had now been in The Philippines for over two months – far longer than they had planned. Their surroundings had grown so familiar and the company so familial, it felt as if the boys had spent years in the western Pacific. Covid 19 may have imprisoned them on the remote Camotes, but it was hardly ‘Colditz.’ Although the boys did have another great escape plan up their shorts! […]

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Last Mango In Paradise! Chapter 3.

So! The escape plan from the small Philippine island had failed miserably. Mainly due to the miserable consulate who had decided not to get in contact with Andrew and Paul, this despite the fact that the boys had handed over two grand for the privilege of an emergency repatriation flight. The plane was to fly them to Manila first, and then they were due to switch aircraft and make headway towards Heathrow. Unfortunately the plan didn’t take off! On the morning of their intended great escape, the boys headed into […]

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Last Mango In Paradise. Chapter One!

Paul took the sharp corner on the exotic island a little too fast! He, as the driver, leant into it but felt his passenger balance in the opposite direction. The bike wobbled precariously and he lost control. He and Andrew then crashed, most exotically, down onto the rock-strewn asphalt, the bike coming heavily down on top of them. Luckily, they had just managed to avoid a tree that would certainly have broken more than their fall. As they lay in a mangled heap, Paul knew it weren’t great! ‘Are you […]

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