The Catfish And The Con Man !!!

Paul said goodbye to Laos’s deliciously debauched capital of Vientiane, and headed back to Thailand for some debauchery of his own. He and Andrew were heading to a small lesser known island on the border with Burma, hoping that, finally The Indian Ocean would provide them with some sunshine. They had so far seen precious little of the yellow stuff during their latest Far Eastern sojourn, so had had to make up with a little more of the amber stuff! Life was certainly a beach without it!  They had made […]

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The Rain Reigneth!

After a stormy start to their travels, Paul and Andrew had now made their way down the eastern coast of Thailand for a ray of sunshine or two. They had arrived at the small seaside town of Prachuap Khiri Khan, just a few miles from the Burmese border, sun cream in hand and sandals on foot. Unfortunately the famous south-west monsoon had other ideas. Unlike Paul, her climactic tears were not yet over and she sobbed incessantly. The sun had got it’s mac on and it wasn’t out to play. […]

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The Lonesome Lola Boy!

  One of Paul’s favourite films had always been ‘Who’s Afraid Of Virginia Woolf’, starring the inimitable Elizabeth Taylor and her then husband Richard Burton. Paul had no idea that years after seeing that masterpiece he and his husband would be giving a frighteningly similar ‘tour de force’ on a shabby Bangkok rooftop at midnight. Unfortunately there were no ‘Oscars’ awarded for this performance. Which was probably quite a good thing, as Paul had held one once, and knew the things to be rather heavy. It could easily have been […]

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# Me Too Please !!!

Paul would like to say he had never been touched up by a female pensioner before but that wasn’t the case! It was, however, the first time it had been by a lady of Thai persuasion, and a Muslim to boot. It was also a novel experience to have it happen on public transport during the day’s first call to prayer. It was almost as painful as the flat imam who shrieked to his flock quite tunelessly and far to regularly. He and Andrew had been squeezed onto the truck […]

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The Old Man And The Sea!

Author’s note. The author apologises for a complete lack of photography in this blog. The reader will realise for themselves why this is the case. Paul had known in the pit of his stomach, that the idea of he and Andrew taking a sea kayak and paddling off for the famous ‘Emerald Cave’ on the edge of Thailand’s Andaman Sea could easily end in disaster. But as per usual he ignored the deep warning signs and instead set off onto the deep for a titanic moment on the high seas. The boys set off from the beach at an ungodly hour, Paul only hoped that there was some seafaring deity who had also risen early and would therefore be looking down or up at them. The sky was a hot slate of muted greys and the sea matched her sullen mood. After a short watch, it was as crystal clear as the Indian ocean, that the Gods had obviously had a very late night! The Boys were on their own. After the inaugural launch of the SS Lola, The Boys  initially paddled in manic circles attempting to work in tandem; their double act though far less successful offshore. They were sinking much faster than they ever did onstage. At least that took a good couple of hours Paul thought. He barked an order at Andrew to come to the right. Andrew misunderstood his nautical command and used the right oar […]

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The Lola Boys Go To Pearl Island!

Paul had implored Andrew not to touch the oyster curry. It sounded to him both unappealing and dangerous. It turned out to be both! On the long train journey down from Prachuap Khiri Khan, heading for the jungle of Khao Sok, Andrew suddenly became violently ill in carriage 8, on seat 29. The passenger in seat 30 was not amused. Andrew suddenly developed the pallor of a stale Brussel sprout, and had already started to emit the putrid wind that is associated with that most unpopular of vegetables. After another of […]

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A Flight Of Fancy!

When Paul gleaned from a terribly friendly gay couple back at the Mekong that one could take up lodgings on a military airbase in Thailand he knew it would take no persuasion to get Andrew onboard. ‘Wing 5’, a military base belonging to The Royal Thai Airforce, amazingly allowed tourists to stay at a hotel put in place for the airmen and their families. As long as their was room of course. Just over the runway and adjacent to the hotel was a gloriously unspoilt beach. Cleaned and swept by the […]

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Paws For Thought!

The Year Of The Dog padded up to the boys without warning, briefly licked their faces, and then scampered noiselessly back to it’s kennel without so much as a yap. In fact the whole celebration for Chinese New Year had been little more than a whimper! Paul had hoped the celebrations in Nong Khai, with it’s large immigrant Chinese population, would be barking mad as usual. But two firecrackers and a couple of lanterns do not a party make. It didn’t stop Paul and Andrew from having their own ‘do’ […]

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Alarm Cocks!

Paul knew Andrew had always enjoyed cock in the early morning, but the noisy dawn chorus which now woke them for the fourth day in a row at 4.28 am was insufferable to them both. Andrew had often crowed irritatingly about being a ‘morning person’ but even these avian alarm cocks where too much for him! Some of the cocky birds began their wooing at just before midnight up on the Mekong, making it clear to Paul that their body clocks were completely out of cock. This rabble of roosters, […]

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A Bridge Over Troubled Water.

The boys arrived in Sangkhom, a small town further along the Mekong, with just a little trepidation. They had visited the friendly workaday settlement four years previously, and had loved it for it’s exquisite ordinariness. Paul rarely liked to journey backwards, much preferring the surprise and adventure of the soi less travelled. Quite often somewhere revisited had lost the very essence of why one returned, tarnishing both the return trip and the original stay. It was always a risk. Fortunately very little had changed in Sangkhom. On pulling in to […]

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